Husband’s relative wants to sleep with his cousin

Dear Pastor,

I am 26 and I have two children. My husband travels a lot because of his job.

He does not like to leave me alone with the children, so his sister comes and stays with us. She is a teacher and she does not have any children. She spends a lot of her time teaching our children. She is not interested in getting married. One day she told me that she is still a virgin and I was surprised. She is a beautiful girl.

The reason why I am writing to you is because a male relative of my husband came to the house and saw her. He did not know that they were related. He asked me who she was and I told him. They are not close cousins. When he started to chat with her, she turned him down flat. He told me that he would do anything for this girl. She said he could have all the money in the world, she would have nothing to do with him. I asked her what she plans to do with her life. She said she is going to wait until the right man comes. I spoke to my husband on the phone and he took it as a joke. The guy has been to the house to see her, but she wouldn't even say hello to him.

I would like to ask you if anything is wrong with two cousins getting married. My husband spoke to him and told him not to come to the house and harass this girl. Instead of understanding why the girl doesn't want him, he told my husband that she is sour grapes and my husband was very upset. So the guy has not returned to the house.

Initial Withheld

Dear Writer,

As I read your letter, I thought of two sisters who have children by two brothers.

After one got pregnant and she observed that her sister liked her babyfather's brother, she talked to her sister. She tried her best to discourage her from going into a relationship with the brother, but she was wasting her time. She could not keep her sister away from this man, so the two of them ended up having a child each for the two brothers. You might be surprised to know how that caused a big contention in the family.

But I must answer your question whether it is wrong for cousins to fall in love, get married and have children. I would say to you, it is something that I do not encourage. However, if they are distant cousins, and by that I mean generations after generations apart, one should not discourage it. But if they are close relatives, it should be discouraged. The Bible does not support cousins getting married and having children, because by doing so, the children might be born with some sort of deformity. It is bad genes why the Lord God does not allow that according to the Bible.

So this young man should take his eyes off his cousin and learn to control himself. He is out of order to describe her as sour grapes. Do you remember the story when the fox cannot get the grape? The fox said they were sour.

Pastor